


Crystal Maiden

by CrystalMaiden_00



Series: Crystal Maiden Project [1]
Category: Original Work
Genre: A bit magic, Depression, Fantasy, First work - Freeform, Humans as guinea pigs, Name Changes, Original Character(s), Original Universe, Racism, Underworld (realm), will be added more later, Ásgarðr | Asgard (realm)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-02
Updated: 2017-10-21
Packaged: 2018-06-05 22:13:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 21,105
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6725566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrystalMaiden_00/pseuds/CrystalMaiden_00
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A 15 years old girl called Zero is held in a lab by the scientists.<br/>The scientists are using her as their experimental subject for a certain project.<br/>One day a little girl appeared in Zero's cell and called her by her real name.<br/>And it changed Zero's life forever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Zero

**Author's Note:**

> Hello there! This is my first original work! (I haven't written a fanfic before tho xD)  
> I know there will be A LOT of mistakes; such as grammar.. (I'm not a native speaker) TwT and the plot might be boring as well  
> But I still appreciate any critics and advises of course! :3 I need your help to make this work better!  
> Please don't copy paste my work, because this is original and you know it's hard to make everything from 0. Though, I doubt anyone would copy paste my work xD I'm still a newbie anyway :'3
> 
> And, if you're wondering that this "Crystal Maiden" is from Dota, no it's not. This is my original idea (I made this title about 5 years ago xD and inspired from "Rune Maiden"), and I don't play dota. Maybe I should try later :3 Is Dota good? Answer me on the comment xD  
> .... well if anyone read this ;w;

Prologue

“A long time ago,

There were 3 realms in the world.

Asgard, realm of the Gods,

Flyria, realm of the Humans,

Underworld, realm of the Chaotic Gods.

One day, a war broke out between Asgard and Underworld.

In the middle of battle, the goddess of creation’s only child, was killed.

Grieving over the loss, the goddess gives her child’s blood to twelve humans.

The twelve humans became super powered and won the war for Asgard.

The twelve humans were called “The Judges”,

Twelve people with unique power to execute anyone who stands in their way.”

 

…

 

“Now you understand what to do, don’t you…?”

 

“Crystal Maiden…”

 

 

* * *

 

 

Scene 1  
Zero

 

"There she is!" a man shouted. They found her out.

"Please calm down, and get back to your room!" one of them said while dragging the girl back to her room.

"No! No! Please, I want to go home! I don't want to be here! I want to see my mother and—" suddenly a bigger man slapped her. The girl started to cry and the bigger man dragged her back to her room roughly. I could still hear her cry as they were gone.

"Zero, you should have not watched that thing." A woman spoke to me. To be honest, I didn't know her name. But it was her job to take care of me here. She never treated me well, though.

"C'mon, you know I'm too lazy to try to leave this place." I said lightly to her. She only stared at me coldly. Looked like she didn't believe me. "I don't have any place to return to, and at least you give me food here. So why would I leave this place?" I said, reassuring her.

She sighed. "Alright, but remember this; if you try to leave, you'll regret it. You'll never be able to leave this place." She said firmly.

_Yeah, I know, you don't need to say it._

After she was done with her business, she left me without saying anything. I sighed and leaned myself against the wall.

They called me Zero. I didn't remember my real name, or at least, I was trying to forget it. Zero sounded cool anyway. I was turning 16.

I had been trapped in that place for years. That was where nerds do some experiments. It was called a "lab", I guess.

I didn't remember how I got here, it didn't matter anyway. People were using me for their project. I didn't know what kind of project, but all I knew is that I was just a guinea pig here. That explained why people treating me like shit.

But even so, I never tried to leave this place. Hey, it wasn't like I loved how people treat me here, it was just useless. Many children tried to leave this place, and no luck, like the girl from earlier. And I bet they did bad things to her, since we were all guinea pigs here. Nobody cared.

Suddenly a young man opened my cell door. He may looked young, but his muscles were so big. "Zero, get out." He grabbed my wrist roughly, pulled me on my feet. It hurt.

"I can walk by myself, buddy. I won't run, I swear. Now lemme go." I said to him. And of course, he didn't believe me. He would be an idiot if he did anyway.

He dragged me to a wider room where I used to practice stuff. I found my "instructor" waiting for me there. He threw me and left the room.

_Goddamn, I'll never marry a guy like that. Though, I'm not sure if I'll get married one day._

Smiling on my own thoughts, I noticed my instructor was glaring at me. I took a deep breath and stood up.

"Uhm, what are we going to do today?" I asked, pretending to be curious.

"We're going to do the test today." Hearing it made my heart race. I knew what kind of test he was talking about. My hands were fisted as I lifted my face to look at him. He gave me a "stop wasting my time" look when I saw his face.

"What are you waiting for? I'm ready."

He raised his hand, and the room went dark.

_It begins._

* * *

The same man threw me back into my cell after I finished the test. The test was tiring me out. I didn't even try to get up and lay myself on the bed. I closed my eyes as I laid on the cold floor. I didn't care if I wouldn't wake up anymore in the morning; well in case, THAT WAS A GOOD THING. After a few seconds, I lost my consciousness.

...

"Sigrun."

I woke up as I heard the voice. It was a woman's voice. Her voice really surprised me. I raised my body and looked around, looking for the source of the voice. I didn't find anyone. No one had called me that for a long time.

I stood up and walked around the cell, trying to find the source once again. But nothing.  _Maybe it was just my imagination_ _..._ I finally decided to stop and brought myself to sit on the bed.

"No one will call you that again..." I said to myself. I sighed as I laid on the cold bed, looking absently at the ceilings. I didn't want to remember that name. I was fine with Zero, although it was not my real name. Slowly I closed my eyes again, trying to sleep. But no avail.

I cursed as I got up. I couldn't sleep just because hearing someone calling my real name in my thoughts.

I opened my shelf and took out a mirror, looking at my own reflection. I could see my face beaten up because of the test earlier.

But suddenly, I noticed something else in the mirror. I saw a purple head was appearing behind my own reflection.

I turned my head to see what was behind me, and there, I saw a purple haired little girl. My eyes were widened when I saw her.

"How did you come here?" I asked her. Judging from her appearance, she wasn't one of us. I meant, she wasn't one of the guinea piggies. Piggies wore the same clothing.

"I'm looking for one of the twelve judges." She said with no expression at all.

_What the hell??_

"Kid, you're going to answer me, aren't you?" I said as I shrugged, looking away from the girl. I didn't want to answer this girl to be honest. It was such... an absurd statement. Everyone knew that those judges gramps only existed in books.

"I repeated, I'm looking for one of the twelve judges." I sighed and finally turned my face to look at her face. She got no expression on her face, but somehow those eyes were piercing me.

"Aaaaand, which one?" I asked, playing along. She suddenly touched my chest. I opened my mouth to protest, but suddenly a strange mark was shining from my chest.

"Crystal Maiden, the twelfth judge." She said calmly. I couldn't take my eyes off the mark that was shining on my chest. It was shining with a violet light.

And it changed my life forever. 

* * *

 


	2. Break Free

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Zero met Nemesis, she decided to break her promise.

Scene 2  
Break Free

 

         

I broke my promise to not attempt to run away. I broke my cell door and ran through the long hallway. I saw some guards were chasing me from behind. One of them pressed an emergency alarm.

_I must be insane._

They tried to shoot me with injections from behind. I dodged them easily; it even felt like I was dancing. I didn't know that I could enjoy this.

_I MUST BE REALLY INSANE._

Well, yeah. Of course I was insane. Thanks to the girl. She told me awesome stuff. And I still couldn't believe it.

* * *

When I saw the mark on my chest, I was stunned. But after that I asked her if she was playing tricks on me.

"My name is Nemesis; I am the Goddess of Fate. I am here to summon you to Asgard." She said with those baby blue eyes looking at me. At first, I didn't believe her. I was about to say something before she took off her hands. "You cannot hide yourself forever, Crystal Maiden."

"What are you talking about? I'm not the Crystal Maiden you mentioned. And I have no intention to role play with you." I said, looking away, because I felt like a big idiot. Although, listening to her did crack me a smile. It was actually hilarious, but I needed to be serious. Suddenly someone barged in the cell.

"You're noisy. What are you doing?" it was her, the woman who took care of me. I turned my face to Nemesis, asking her to explain what was going on. But Nemesis didn't do a thing. And surprisingly, the woman didn't seem to notice Nemesis. She turned on the lamp and looked at me. When she looked at me, I saw a weird expression on her face as she gasped. It was... surprise, fear, and disgust. I didn't know why she made such an expression, so I looked into the mirror to see what was wrong with me. And then I noticed them. My eyes. They were deep blue before. But they changed to purple. How...?

The woman came closer to me. She took my wrist and tried to bring me out from my cell. I didn't know exactly what would happen, but I knew that it wouldn't be a good thing.

"What are you going to do?" I said as I refused to move. She glared at me and tried to pull me stronger than before, my legs still refused to move though. "If you're not going to answer me, then don't ever expect me to move." She still refused to answer me. She just held my wrist tighter and gave me a piercing look.

_You're a failure to this project._

That thought were echoing in my head. I pushed her away from me and ran to the locked door. I tried to open the door, but it didn't budge. I knew it.

I felt cold hands on my shoulder, turning me around. A hard slap landed on my right cheek, leaving a red mark on it. I froze for a moment. She never did it before.

"Don't even try." She said coldly. Strangely, I felt something in my heart; something that I couldn't describe. But it felt like my heart was going to explode any time soon.

"You won't try to do it again." I said intimidatingly. I could see fear in her eyes as she heard me, although she tried to stay cool. Feeling a bit superior, I put a smirk on my face.

"Have you ever thought that one day..." I put my hands beside my shoulders; acting like I had no idea. "Animals will rule over the world, and treat humans like how they treated them?"

Of course, she didn't answer me. I chuckled, and suddenly I felt a very strong energy in my body. It was flowing through my veins. I knew she could feel it as well, judging from her expression. The smirk on my face went wider.

"You're going to open this door for me, aren't you?" I asked with a raspy voice. I didn't wait for her answer. I gazed through her eyes as I felt my eyes glowing. And I did it. She didn't move.

"I'm gonna prove it to you, that even pigs can ruin your stupid project." I whispered. I brought myself closer to the door. With only a kick, the door flew away. And of course, it woke the guards up.

* * *

And that was how I ended up like this.

A group of bigger men appeared in front of me. They were armed with guns.

"Stop it right there!" they screamed at me. I didn't listen to them, I kept running. They were going to shoot me when I felt my eyes began to glow again. I flicked my fingers and they dropped their guns.

"Easy." I said mockingly as I ran through them. I didn't know where the exit was, but I couldn't stop. I was looking for the exit for about 10 minutes, though, 10 minutes felt like an hour to me. I didn't count how many guards who tried to stop me. There were so many of them, yet nobody managed to stop me. At least, I didn't kill any of them. I only paralyzed them.

When I reached the exit, I saw my instructor, waiting for me there. I stopped running and stared at him.

"Thanks for the hospitality, but I'm still leaving." I said coldly. He didn't move. He only clapped his hands, which was confusing to me.

"You did a very good job, Zero. You've proven that you passed our test." He said. I opened my eyes wider in surprise.  _Is this actually a test_ _..._ _? No, no. It's impossible. I decided to leave by my own. There's no way that they're expecting this to happen._

"I know you want to leave this place so badly. But have you ever imagine what's waiting for you outside?" he said, full of concern, or at least I thought so. He was right.

_Even if I leave, where should I go? I have nowhere to go. What if I get hungry? What if someone attacks me? If I choose to stay here, at least I still have a place to stay, foods to eat, and medical treatment whenever I need it._

I shook my head to throw the thoughts away. I couldn't stop now. Seeing my reaction, he grinned.

"Do you know why we chose you to become our subject?" that question caught my full attention. I wanted to know the answer. And I also wanted to know what kind of project that they were doing.

"I don't know. Mind telling me?" I asked with a curious tone. He seemed satisfied. He came closer to me and put his hand on my shoulder.

"We'll talk about it tomorrow morning. It will be a very long conversation. Now you should take a rest." That answer disappointed me. I put his hand aside and looked straight into his eyes.

"Well, do you know why I'm not coming with you?" I said as I look at him daringly. He didn't seem happy with it. He grabbed my wrist harshly. But before he could drag me, I pierced him with my glowing eyes.

"'cause I'm tired being a pig." I answered my own question as I paralyzed him. Even when he was paralyzed, he could still show disgust on his face. That was kind of amusing. "I want to be treated like a human. Maybe it'll be a tough journey out there. But I might find a better place than this prison out there. So, why not?" I shrugged and walked to the exit. I could hear my instructor struggling behind me.

I finally reached the exit. I put my hands on the door, pushing it. But suddenly, my instructor's voice stopped me.

"You think you can fool them?!" once again, he got my attention. I spun my body to him. He could move a little bit now. I gave him "What do you mean?" look.

"Those eyes! Those eyes aren't human's! You're a failure to our project and if you get out of this place, we'll be in trouble! That's why..." suddenly, he was free from my control. He could move freely. He took a pocketknife out from his coat as he walked towards me. "...we have to finish you right now." His tone was really intimidating. It sent me shiver through my spine.

I turned my back and pushed the door as fast as I could. The door was half-opened when suddenly my body stopped moving. I couldn't move my body, no matter how hard I tried. I heard a low chuckle behind me. He came closer and closer. My heart felt like it was going to explode anytime.

"That's why you should have not disrespected your instructor. I know more tricks than you do." He said with a harsh tone. I ordered my body to move, but no avail.  _This is bad_ _..._ _he's really close now_ _..._

"Why don't you try killing him?" suddenly a familiar voice ringing in my head. It was Nemesis's. I tried to look around, but I couldn't move my head.

_Great idea, Nem. But I couldn't even move, let alone kill someone._

Suddenly, a something happened. I could move my body again. I was so relieved, but it was too early to celebrate. While I could move my body, I pushed the door and ran through it. But before I ran too far, I realized something strange. I didn't hear his footsteps anymore. I looked back and found him kneeling on the floor, trembling. And then, I saw her. I almost forgot about her.

Nemesis.

From what had just happened, even a dumb knows that this girl was not just an ordinary girl. And she was calling me "Crystal Maiden" earlier? And what was with that mark? This girl owed me a lot of explanation.

Hesitated, I brought myself closer to Nemesis, who was standing beside my instructor. I was afraid if my instructor was just pretending to be paralyzed. I could just turn around and run, honestly. But shit. I needed Nemesis's explanation. It wasn't like me, but I was still going to risk my own life for some words from her.

"Aren't you going to finish him now?" she said suddenly. My eyes were widened when I heard it. I stopped walking and looked into her eyes. They were lacking of emotion. How could she was so distant...?

"Killing people is not my style." I said, shrugging. She tilted her head and looked at my instructor.

"But he deserves it. He treats you like garbage. He hurts you. He was using you. He was going to kill you." She said as she turned her face to look at me. She took out a dagger from her pocket and slid it to me. I took the dagger. It was so beautiful. That kind of dagger must be expensive. Where did she get it?

"It's called Avenger. It's a dagger which is used to avenge someone's pain in Asgard. As long as the person you want to kill has hurt someone else in front of you, that dagger can cut through them." she answered the questions in my head. Though, it made a new question. How did she read my mind?

"What are you waiting for? Finish him." She said, almost like she was ordering me. I turned my head toward my instructor. I gazed him for a while, and finally looked to the dagger.

Avenger...

_Have I seen him hurt someone else in front of me?_

...

I couldn't remember.

My instructor never really left his office. But still, he hurt me over, over, and over. I wouldn't want to tell anyone how he hurt me. Anyway, I hated him. I walked closer to him, with Avenger in my small hands. I could see him trembling. He tried to beg for mercy, but he couldn't talk.

I felt my eyes glowing when I stood in front of him. Tears began to fall from his eye pockets. I raised my hand to stab his heart. But something stopped me. I put the dagger in my pocket and walked away.

"Don't let such weakness stop you, Sigrun." Nemesis said as I kept walking. I didn't stop walking. I shoved my hands in my pockets, and sighed slightly.

"I told you killing is not my style, Nem." I said as I reached the exit. What stopping me was; I wasn't ready to bear the guilt. Even if he was the worst person in the world, killing, to me, was still wrong. I didn't want to live the rest of my life as a murderer. And I just... couldn't take away someone's life that easily.

As I walked a few steps out of the lab, I heard a very loud scream behind me. Quickly, I turned my body, and that was where I saw it.

His body was lying on a pool of blood. Terror filled his face for the last time.

Nemesis murdered him.

* * *

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading this far! :D  
> I need someone to help me to fix the grammar and add more tags! :C I'm still really new at this


	3. The Creator

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After experiencing what happened in the laboratory, especially witnessing a little girl who claimed to be the Goddess of Fate killed Sigrun's inspector, Sigrun starts to believe that Nemesis might be more than just a little girl.  
> Doing her job; Nemesis is going to bring Sigrun to Asgard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for ppl who read this junk xD I really appreciate it  
> Have fun!

Scene 3  
The Creator

 

"You're so quiet." Suddenly her voice snapped me out from my thoughts.

"U-uh yeah, I'm just still surprised." I said, a bit nervous. She tilted her head.

"Why? Is it because I killed him?" I gulped as I heard her. I held my skirt tight, trying to make my nervousness go away, although it failed. "He hurt you, and he was going to kill you. I was just saving your life." She said calmly. Her calmness made me uncomfortable. It was just like; she had killed many people before. I felt like talking to a murderer.

"Ye-yeah, I guess you saved my neck there. Thanks." I said as I looked away.

"Are you scared?" she said. I looked down, not answering her. "I know you are."

"We-well, I'm so confused right now... Care to explain everything?" I said nervously. She nodded.

"I am Nemesis, the goddess of fate. The Goddess of Creation gave my sisters and me a quest to gather the twelve judges. I came here to get the twelfth judge, Crystal Maiden-"

"Wait a second" I cut her. "The twelve judges... are they even real?"

"Well, do you know anything about them?" she asked, testing my knowledge.

"Of course, everyone knows about it. It's a story about a war between Asgard and Underworld. In the middle of battle, the Goddess of Creation's child was killed. With their blood, the Goddess transformed 12 humans into super-powered beings called "judges". And in the end, Asgard won the war because of the judges." she nodded after she heard my explanation.

"It's not just a fiction. It did happen, thousands years ago." She stated. Suddenly, a tome appeared out of nowhere. She opened the tome and raised her point finger. "Asgard did won the war, and as the result, Flyria is free from Underworld."

"So you're saying that Underworld was invading Flyria, and Asgard came up and helped Flyria like some kind of superhero?" I said with a small grin on my face. Nemesis' expression didn't change, but I knew she didn't like it at all.

"That's a bit rude, but yes. It is Asgard's duty to take care of Flyria. Asgard saved Flyria. And that's why Flyria is in debt with Asgard." Nemesis said calmly.

"So what are you going to do with me?" I asked. Nemesis turned her eyes to me and closed her tome.

"I'm going to bring you to your creator." She said. I wasn't surprised, but that made me kind of nervous. Because, I didn't believe in this creator, and I cursed at this person whenever something bad happened to me.

I blamed mostly everything on the creator. I said things like  _"Hey creator, if you really exist, you're such a harsh bastard."_  I had no will to live. But I couldn't just kill myself. I wouldn't kill myself like a coward; running away from problems that might never be solved. I would rather living in pain than that.

But knowing that this person MIGHT ACTUALLY exists made me think that she would give me a bunch of punishments. I didn't want to receive any punishments. But, oh well, I didn't regret anything anyway. And I'd feel like a real coward if I run away.

"When are you going to take me to this Goddess?" I asked. Suddenly curiosity was all over me. I wanted to see how this Goddess looked like. Though, curiosity kills the cat.

Nemesis took my hand. And then I felt really light, like I could float anytime. And suddenly, we were somewhere else. I stood at the entrance of an enormous shrine. The shrine was built on a floating island which was full of flowers. The scenery was really beautiful; it took my breath away. I had to admit that the place really looked like a paradise.

"This is where the Goddess of Creation lives. She's waiting for you inside the shrine." Nemesis said with a flat look.  _She's kinda stoic, isn't she?_

"Yes, I am. Got any problem with that?"

"No-nope." I said quickly. Whoops, I forgot that she could read my mind.

I left Nemesis and walked toward the gate. I pushed the big gate and walked into the shrine. Nemesis followed me from behind. Inside the shrine I saw a wide pond; full of water lilies. In the middle of the pond, I could see a throne, and a woman was sitting on it. But unfortunately, a curtain hid her, so I couldn't get to see her face.

"I can feel it... It's my son's blood... Crystal Maiden, you've finally arrived." She said softly. Her voice was beautiful and soft, it would make everyone thought that she was a really kind-hearted person. Well, maybe she was.

"But... something feels strange on you... it's resonating within you... something... bad." I could see her resting her head on her hand behind the curtain as she said that. I opened my mouth to answer her, but suddenly Nemesis casted a magic on my leg, and I fell down. I moaned in pain.

"Kneel." she said coldly, without any expression. I took a deep breath, and glared at her.

"I really hate to kneel before someone who I don't believe in. But okay, I'll do it. Not for any of you; but for my own life." I said full of hate as I brought myself to kneel before this "creator" . I looked down on the floor. My heart was full of anger and hate. I hadn't felt something like that before. But strangely, I still felt bad for her to saying things like that.

The Goddess of Creation sighed. She stood up and opened the curtain. I raised my head to see her form. But, unfortunately, she was really shining. It hurt my eyes. But I saw her form for a second.

"Did I do... something wrong?" she said to me. I didn't answer her. My hatred toward her engulfed me. I really wanted to scream, but I held myself. I didn't want to make the situation worse.

"Nemesis... from what I saw, she can stun people with her gaze." She looked at Nemesis.

"Yes, she can do it She made their brain stopped responding to their own bodies just by gazing through them." Nemesis explained. I thought The Goddess of Creation knew everything? I'm  _her_ creation after all. That thought made me doubt her even more and more.

The Goddess of Creation went back to her throne and sat on it. She looked like she was thinking or trying to remember something. "Crystal Maiden's power is not to control one's body; but to control one's mind..." she rubbed her chin. "But there's no mistaking it... This girl is absolutely Crystal Maiden. I can feel it."

"Yes, your Majesty. This girl is clearly Crystal Maiden." Nemesis nodded. "However, she behaves differently..."

"Looks like the crisis we're facing right now affects the judges." The Goddess of Creation said sadly. She stood up and suddenly she looked very charismatic. I looked up at her, but I still couldn't see her.

"Crystal Maiden, maybe you have forgotten about me and about yourself. I am your creator; The Goddess of Creation. I am here to summon you on a quest to restore the world."

"As you know, the gods are superior beings. Without our power, the Underworld would take over Flyria and ruin everything by now." She took a deep breath before she continues.

"However, history repeats itself. In the middle of crisis, our powers start to get weaker and weaker. And in order to restore our power, we need to gather the twelve judges. Crystal Maiden, as the twelfth judge, I want you to gather the eleven judges. Now, go! Find them, and bring them to me!"

As The Goddess of Creation said that, Nemesis asked me to stand up, and pulled me to leave the shrine.

"Crystal Maiden... You need to remember about yourself..."

* * *

Nemesis brought me to her shrine. Her shrine was located on a floating island as well, but her shrine looked very different from the Goddess of Creation's. Her shrine was smaller than hers and it was built with granite.

"Listen, since your power was just awakened, I know that you don't really know anything. You won't be able to do your job as Crystal Maiden. So I'm going to teach you how to become an appropriate judge. I'm also going to teach you how to fight." Nemesis said as some angels opened the door for us.

"Wait Nemesis." I said to her.

"What is it?"

"Do I... really have to do this?" I asked her as we kept walking. And then she stopped walking.

"Of course. We really need your power." She said.

"But why? Is it because your power is weakening?" I asked.

"Indeed." She turned her face at me. "Underworld is going to take this chance to take over Flyria; there's no doubt about it. We cannot hand Flyria to them, so we have to regain our power back as soon as possible." She said with a flat tone.

"But how can your power gets weaker and weaker? And why is Underworld so desperate to take over Flyria?" I asked her out of curiosity. But it wasn't just because of my curiosity, I  _needed_  to know why as well.

"... I'll tell you about that. But first." Her tome appeared out of nowhere. She opened a certain page and took out a sword from the tome. "As I said before, I'm going to teach you everything you need to know. It's not going to be easy. And It's going to take much time. But it's much better than seeing you fail. So you better get ready."

 


	4. Her Mission

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the intense training, Nemesis finally decided to test Sigrun's ability.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter, Sigrun's past will be revealed a bit xD  
> Enjoy!

Scene 4  
Her Mission

Since then, Nemesis started to train me. As she promised, she taught me how to fight. It was rough, since she tried to teach me as fast as she could. We had an important task after all. She also taught me about many things I needed to know as the twelfth judge. Like why do I have to be the one who gather the other judges.

_"You are the only one who has to gather all of the judges. The other judges do not have to do it. It is because you are the only one who is given the power to find all of them. The twelve judges was born from the goddess of creation's child's blood. Each one of you describes about the story of their life. Crystal Maiden describes about their journey to find a sacred ornament in order to seal Underworld away. Using their sharp senses and intuition, they were lead to a maiden who lived in a meadow where a giant crystal lies. The sacred ornament lied within the giant crystal. So in other words, you are given their sharp senses and intuition."_

Nemesis could answer most of my answers. But still there were some answers she didn't know. She claimed that it was due to her power got weaker. She would know everything if her it wasn't about her power.

4 years had passed since Nemesis started to train me. We took too long. But even so, she was going to test me, to see whether I was ready or not to do the task. She didn't care how much longer it would take if I failed the test.

_But I'm going to prove that I'm ready to do this task._

As soon as I was done dressing, I pushed the gate and head outside the shrine. Outside the shrine, there was Nemesis, writing on her tome. I brought myself closer to her. And when I stood behind her, she closed her tome, and turned to me.

"Are you ready?" She tilted her head

"Yes." I said firmly.

"You know we can't waste time any longer. Please don't disappoint me." She said coldly. Though, her coldness didn't bother me at all.

"You won't be disappointed." I said with a grin on my face.

"Hmm.. You've changed, haven't you?" She said as she reopened her tome.

"Really?" I said, a bit surprised. Though, if I really thought about it, I really have changed.

"Yes. You weren't as confident as today. You played it cool, yet you had a lot of doubts in your heart. And you were very rude too." she said calmly. Hearing it, I got embarrassed.

"But anyway, shall we begin?" She said before I could open my mouth to complain.

"Yes." I said as I nodded. She nodded back at me.

"Let's start with knowledge." She gazed through my eyes. "Who are your targets?"

"My targets are the eleven judges. The one who inherits the child of creation goddess's blood. They are Phalanx Progenitor, Prominent Ringmaster, Abyssal Keeper, Salamander Fang, Apocalypse Singer, Macrocosm Prophet, Mystical Messenger, Bright Shadow, Gaudy Lily, Scarlet Radiance, and Emerald Hunter."

"Who is the strongest judge?"

"Phalanx Progenitor is the strongest judge. They are inherited with the child's power to regenerate their body parts in seconds. Also, just like the child, Phalanx Progenitor is inherited with the goddess of creation's strength in combat and commanding; making them the best commander also the most ferocious beast in a battlefield."

"Well then, you know well about Phalanx Progenitor. But what about yourself? What are your powers?"

"Crystal Maiden is inherited with the child's sharp senses and intuition. With those, Crystal Maiden is able to find the judges. And they are also given the power to control someone's mind to gather more information."

"But how can you control someone's body's instead?" She asked.

"That's..." I looked down. I didn't know the answer.

"Well, it doesn't matter. We will know why for sure. But no matter what the reason is, it won't affect our mission." She said. I nodded at her.

_Nothing will ever be able to stop me. I will protect Flyria._

"Although," her words pulled me back to reality. "I didn't expect that this era Crystal Maiden is an esperanza." She said with the same flat look. Her words really jabbed right at me.

What she said was something that I would never be able to deny. Esperanza is a race between angel and demon. A long time ago, the demonic prince, Lucian, fell in love with a war angel, Luciel. They both ran away and hid themselves. They had many children. And one day, Lucian was caught and executed by Asgard. Grieving over the loss, Luciel committed suicide.

We, Esperanza, have 3 pairs of wings, just like war angels. Our wings grow when we reach the age of 18. But we also have a very unique thing that makes us different from the other race. It's our eye color. Our eye color is purple. And it makes everyone can recognizes and hunt us down easily. Of course, as something that is between angel and demon, we are considered as something that should've never existed. The other races hate us, and they hunt us down. Esperanza is almost extinct.

When I was 3, I was all alone. I didn't have anything at all; no home, no food, no money, no friends, no family. I had to eat leaves or some random plants to live. No one was willing to give me some food, let alone take me in. All of them hated me and called me "monster" because I am an esperanza. And of course, I didn't realize that. I thought I was a normal human. Whenever they saw me, they would try so hard to kill me. Every king set a very high price for my head. And that made me avoid any contacts with humans. Even animals can sense my race, and if they do, they will surely hunt me down.

When I was taken by the scientists, they injected me with some kind of liquid. And when I looked at the mirror, my eyes were deep blue. I didn't know why they did it. Since I know now, I think it explains why the woman who took care of me really thought that I was a failure to their project.

_Because I am an esperanza. An unwanted creature._

"It doesn't matter whether I'm an esperanza or not. It won't affect our task. I will fulfill this task." I said confidently. Although Nemesis didn't have any expression, somehow I could tell that she was satisfied with my answer.

"I like your determination. Never lose that." She said. I nodded and trying to hide the happiness of being praised in my heart. I couldn't be emotional. "Shall we continue?"

"Yes, please." I said.

"So, how do you find the other judges?"

"I need to use my sharp senses and intuition. Close my eyes and feel it with my heart. And then it will lead me somewhere."

"And when you find one?"

"I'll show my Crystal Maiden mark and bring them to Asgard."

"Perfect." Nemesis clapped her hands. "But do you know how do the judges pass their marks through generation?"

"When the judge find someone who is appropriate to become the next generation, their mark will shine and move to its new vessel."

"Indeed." She said as she closed her tome. It wasn't as many as I expected. "And for the last question, what us your motivation to do this task?"

"Huh..?" I said unconsciously.

"What is your true motive to fulfill this task? You know that this is a task to protect Flyria, the realm where everybody tries to kill you. And this task was given by our creator, someone you hate and don't believe in. And yet, you are still very determined to do this. Why?" She asked with a low voice.

"It's because I'm an esperanza." I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. "Esperanza is unwanted. There's no doubt about it. Even Asgard and Underworld despise us. Our existence means nothing to the world but trouble. But other than that..." I touched my chest and opened my eyes. "I am Crystal Maiden, the twelfth judge. I'm the only one who can find the other judges. I'm finally needed to both Asgard and Flyria. My life has no other meaning than this. This is my mission."

"I like the look in your eyes." Nemesis said. My eyes were widened hearing that. "That's a good reason. Now let's continue to the next test."

"Ba-battle?" I asked.

"Scared?"

I shook my head. "No."

Nemesis raised her hand and summoned five monsters we called as "elescia". I prepared my scythe; a weapon which I'm good at.

And then the test began.

_I will pass this._

* * *

I panted after I beat the last elescia. They were pretty tough, but I defeated them.

_It's finally over._

"No, it's not over yet." Nemesis said. Surprised, I turned myself toward Nemesis.

"What do you mean? I've defeated them." I said, confused.

"You haven't killed them yet." She said.

"But... is it really necessary? Let them live." I said.

"Well, is it necessary to keep monsters around and let them live?" She said with a jabbing gaze. "Have you forgotten what elescia is?" She asked.

Elescia is a race of monsters. They're made of random kinds of mana which made them look very different and unorganized. They were underlings of Sarqael, a first-ranked grim angel. Sarqael betrayed Asgard for executing her friends. She sent all of her underlings to attack Flyria. Then Sarqael was finally killed by Lodea; the last aedolean who belongs to the goddess of death, Eris.

Aedolea is the lowest-class race among the other races. Even lower than esperanza. People with the heaviest sins will be reborn as an aedolea. Aedoleans live their life as a slave to the Gods. However, Aedolea is almost extinct. They were sent by the gods to get rid of esperanzas about 18 years ago. The mission was failed. Esperanzas were much stronger than aedoleans. And the only aedolean who survived the mission is Lodea.

But enough about that stuff.

"Of course I remember, Nem..." I said with a low voice.

"Maybe you share the same feelings with them since you are an esperanza. But Asgard doesn't appreciate betrayal. It is one of our mission to get rid of the betrayers." She said coldly. Her words stabbed through my chest.

She was right. If I wasn't Crystal Maiden, she would surely kill me. Not just Nemesis, but everyone in Asgard. It was true that I was needed, but I was still unwanted.

"Now finish them." She said. Without saying a thing, I brought myself closer to one of the elescia. I could feel it's breath. I could still feel its heartbeat. Slowly, I picked up my scythe. Before I aim it to it, I look into its eyes.

"I'm sorry..." I whispered.

_Please, don't... we just want to live!_

Hearing the echo in my head, I dropped my scythe by accident. I completely understood that feelings. It was the feelings when you didn't do anything wrong, but they kept trying to kill you. Calling you a monster just because of your unwanted birth.

I fell on my knees. I looked down as my hands trembled. Tears flooded in my eye pockets.

"I-I... I can't do it..." I murmured to myself. I tried to hold my tears as I kept hoping that Nemesis would understand. But it was a stupid action.

"You're going to fail the test if you stop now. Being softhearted doesn't help you here. You think I'm going to give you my sympathy? And I thought this was your mission?" She said coldly. At the moment I really hated her. But I couldn't deny her words. If I stopped there, I ended everything.

Once again, I looked at the elescia's eyes. I closed my eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. I stood up and picked up my scythe.

"I'm really sorry..." I whispered to it. Although it was too soft to be heard.

And then I aimed my scythe and cut its head.

 

 


	5. Departure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally realizes her purpose in life, Sigrun puts her personal feelings aside and swears that she will fulfill her task perfectly.

 

Scene 5  
Departure

"Well done. You passed the test." Nemesis said after I killed all of them. I didn't say a thing after that. I didn't want to celebrate it. I should've felt a bit happy since that meant I could finally do my mission. But still... I felt like an ignorant jerk.

"Since we have taken too much time, we need to hurry. I haven't lost all of my power yet, and I think I will be fine for about 3 more years. But still, it's better to get our job done as soon as possible. As the goddess of fate, I have a very crucial position for the 3 realms." She said.

"Yes, I understand." I said.

Nemesis opened her tome and at a certain page, she took out a piece of paper. She handed it to me. I took the paper.

"It's a world map. You'll need this to find the judges. Judges usually remain in the places which have similar situation like the situation in their stories. We'll depart tomorrow. So I want you to get ready and decide our destination. Understood?" She asked.

"Yes."

"Now get some rest." Nemesis said as she headed out from the floating island.

I head into the shrine and walks to my own room. In my room, i threw myself to the bed, covering my face with pillow. I couldn't stop thinking about what I did.

I killed them... They who have similar fate like mine...

I pressed my face to the pillow, crying. I was crying for about an hour until I got up and looked myself on the mirror.

"Stop crying..." I said to myself as I wiped the tears away. "Because of them, I can do my mission now. I will fulfill my mission, no matter what happens!"

* * *

After some mourning, I took out the world map Nemesis gave me. I tried to think where our destination should be.

With Nemesis's power, we could teleport anywhere we like, so the location didn't matter at all. The problem was, there were only 11 judges and there were like billions people out there. We couldn't waste our time anymore, and remembering about it gave me more pressure.

I opened my notes about the eleven judges and Flyria, trying to predict where they were with the data I had. After about 10 minutes, I finally got an idea where one of the judges was.

On the east part of Flyria, there's Savelina, the land of dragon. On the edge of Savelina lies a steep cliff where an entrance can be found. It is said that the entrance leads deep to Flyria's core, a  place where Elden, the eldest dragon lives. The judge that might be found there is...

_Abyssal Keeper._

* * *

After I "packed" my stuff into my small bag, I stood in front of the mirror and looked into my eyes.

_They're purple..._

I tried to think a way to hide my real eye color. If people saw my eyes, it would slow me down to find the judges.

_And if the judges see my eyes, they probably won't cooperate with me, because I'm an esperanza._

The thought saddened me, but I shook it off and walked out from the shrine. I sat on the grass and felt the breeze on my skin.

_"Purple eyes? How rare... they're very beautiful."_

His words were echoing in my head, made me started to miss the time we spent together back then.

"I wonder... did he survive that earthquake?" I said to myself softly.

Remembering about him brought the old feelings back together. I was lost in my own thoughs for a pretty long time.

...

"Hey." A voice pulled me back to reality. I turned my body to the voice's source. There, I saw an angel. From her attire, she was a guardian angel.

There are 3 kinds of angel in asgard; war angel, guardian angel, and grim angel. They have different duties and responsibilities.

War angels are angels who fight against the demons. Their duty is to eleminate foes and protect Asgard.

Guardian angels are the most popular angel to the humans. Their duty is to protect people who live in Flyria. Humans sometimes name their child after them.

And lastly, Grim angels. Grim angels are angels who takes someone's life away. They mostly take orders from the goddess of death, Eris.

"Can I... help you?" I asked politely, yet carefully. She looked at me with an annoyed look on her face. She folded her arms and kept looking at me with that look. I gotta say that was really uncomfortable. I had a feeling that that angel was just going to waste last rest my time.

"Uhm, if all you want to is stare at me with that look, I'm gonna leave." I said breaking the silence. And that was when she decided to talk.

"When are you leaving?" She asked. Oh, she wanted me to leave.

"Tomorrow. We won't meet anymore, don't worry." I said. Hearing it, she seemed satisfied. Honestly, I was hurt.

"Make sure you do your job right. Do you know the spell to conceal those eyes?" she asked.

"Such a spell does exist?" I asked, surprised. She shrugged at me and sighed.

"You're Crystal Maiden, and you  _don't_  know?" she laughed cynically.

_How can she save the world? She may be Crystal Maiden, but she is still an esperanza! No one can trust that kind._

Her thoughts rang in my head over and over. I closed my eyes for a while. I took a deep breath and reopened my eyes again.

"If your business here is only to insult me, then I recommend you to leave at once." I said calmly. It took me courage to say it. I got those kinds of comment every day, but I ignored them. I just thought that if I told them what was in my head, it would make things worse. And more importantly, no one would help me out since I'm an esperanza. Nemesis would probably help me out, but... I didn't want to cause her any trouble. Especially since Nemesis STILL hated me because of my blood.

"Don't act all high and mighty just because you're Crystal Maiden. Remember, you're still an unwanted being." She said mockingly.

"What's your problem for me being an esperanza? It's not like I hurt you or anything!" I said with a louder voice as I fisted my hands.

"Oh, maybe you don't. But certainly you—"

"Instead of fighting over this topic over and over, why don't you teach her how to conceal her eye color?" Nemesis suddenly came and interrupted our little conversation.

"I'm sorry milady. I will do it right away." The angel said, obeying Nemesis's order with fear in her voice. She walked closer to me as she told me a spell. I casted the spell and my eyes shouldn't be purple anymore. But since I couldn't see them, I couldn't tell. The angel walked backward and knelt to Nemesis.

"Good. I appreciate that." Nemesis said to the angel. The angel shook her head.

"The honor is all mine, milady." The angel said.

"What brings you here?" Nemesis asked the angel.

"Lady Apollo wishes to speak with you personally at her shrine. She asked me to escort you to her shrine." The angel explained. So she came to find Nemesis all along...

"Very well. We shall head to her shrine." Nemesis said flatly, as always.

"Yes, milady." The angel said as she stood up. Nemesis spread her wings and left the shrine. The angel followed Nemesis from behind.

"Maybe I should head in and rest..." I whispered to myself.

In my room, I took off my boots and laid myself on the bed. I looked at the ceilings as my thoughts began to consume me one more time, the thoughts about him. It had been 3 years since I lost him.

"I wonder how you are doing... Alfred..." I whispered to myself.


	6. How We Met

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Before Sigrun was caught by the scientists, she was a 1st class fugitive to every being.  
> She wandered from town to town, trying to survive in the harsh world she lives in.  
> Until one day, she met someone special.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a flashback. Enjoy ^^

Scene 6  
How We Met

 I was resting in an empty house when someone suddenly came into the house and found my hideout. She screamed for help as she ran out from the house. I knew that my life was in danger.

I jumped out from the window and ran as fast as I could. I was hoping that I could get away, but I was too late. Some people had already waiting for me, preventing me from getting away.

"There she is! The monster girl!" One of them said. Some children behind the person picked up some pebbles and threw them to me. Fortunately, all of them were missed because I was standing a bit far from them.

I turned back and trying to get away from them, but more people came from both sides. I couldn't run away.

"This way she won't be able to get away." Someone said behind me. I didn't know what to do, and unfortunately, there was nothing I could do but praying that a miracle would occur.

They were throwing me with pebbles and rocks. I ducked down and cover my head with my hands, trying to protect myself from those rocks and pebbles. Rocks and pebbles hit my body over and over. It really hurt.

"Please... stop..." I begged softly as I cried. They didn't hear me. Although even if they heard me, they wouldn't stop. They kept throwing at me.

"Hey! Remember our king wants her to be alive!" One of them said. I was pretty surprised when I heard that because the other countries wanted me dead.

"Fine. Let's tie her up."

After they tied me, they threw me into cage. They put the cage into a horse cart.

And they took me away.

* * *

I felt pain all over my body. I moaned from the pain and tried to move my body. Realizing that I wasn't dreaming, I opened my eyes slowly. I was lying in a cold cage, and was still tied.

I could hear horse's tramples, which meant I was still on my way to somewhere, probably the capital.

 _I wonder what the king is going to do with me..._ I thought with my eyes looking forward, with no emotion. Probably he was going to execute me.

_No one wants me_

_No one needs me_

_No one wants to see me alive_

_Nothing bad is going to happen if I die now_

_Instead, people will be happy_   _if I die_

Those thoughts were echoing in my head over and over. They pulled me deep into despair. I was lost in negative thoughts, meekly hoping to stop the pain I felt that time.

Then suddenly an extremely negative thought came into my mind. If I died, then people would happy, and the pain I felt would disappear as well.

Death probably was my only savior from everything I suffered. I was considering to end everything when suddenly the horse stopped moving. Someone came and looked at me coldly.

"Execution time, monster." He said, full of despise. Then, he took the cage out from the horse cart and brought it into a building which is made of stone. It was dark inside that building; there wasn't any source of lightning. He went down along the stairs. And when we reached the basement, he put the cage on the floor. 

In the middle of darkness, I tried to looked at his face. I could hear him groaning. He took out something from his pocket, and pressed a button on it. As he pressed the button, that thing was providing a bit light. Though, I wasn't sure that thing was meant to provide us some light. He pressed that thing several times and placed it near his ear. After waiting for some seconds, I could hear someone was talking from that thing.

_"Hey! You caught it?"_

"Yea. Bring the guy here right now! He'd be happy to see the thing he wanted so badly."

_"Whoa, man! So you really caught that monster? You guys really are somethin'! I can't wait for our reward!"_

"Now, now, don't get all excited! This monster--" he stomped on the cage. "might run away y'know. It'd be bad for business!"

" _Hahahaha! You'll just need to keep your eyes on it!"_

"Y'know that I'm not a monster. If this thing unleashes its real strength, it might get away! Now hurry!"

_"Fine, fine. Sending the boys and the king guy there!"_

He pressed a button, and that thing stopped talking. He put back that thing into his pocket.

The king was on his way. I knew my life was going to be over. I closed my eyes and clenched my fist in despair. Why would I want to stay alive anyway? It just would be better and easier for everyone if I died.

When I lost in thoughts, that man stomped on the cage hard. I curled into a ball. He didn't stop, he kept stomping on it. I was trembling in fear knowing that he might've broke the cage with his strong leg.

"Y'know, I don't want to be in the same room with such a filthy monster. I'm leaving. Don't even try to run away. The king might want you to be alive, but it is understandable if we end your life right now, for our sake." he said as he kept stomping on the cage. He was very intimidating. After he felt satisfied, he stopped and left the basement.

Knowing that I was going to lose my life soon, I gave in. I lost all of my hopes. I closed my eyes and waited for the king to come and end my life.

_It was really tough, but I_ _made it this far._

* * *

"...the hell?! ......don't....... GYAAAAAAAAARRRRGGGGHHH!!"

That scream woke me up. I jumped right after I heard that scream. I tried to look around, but it was still too dark. Even though my eyes had adapted to the dark, it was still pretty hard to tell what I was seeing.

Footsteps could be heard from my position. Someone was coming to the basement. My heart pounded much faster than before. I clenched my fists hard as I felt the cold sweat dripped through my forehead.

_Is that... the king?_

I gulped as I heard that person pushed the door. That person held a torch, which lightened the room and made my eyes hurt. But the person who was holding the torch wasn't the man who caught me nor the king. It was a boy.

"Are you... okay?" He asked. I was so speechless. What would happen to me next...?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter won't be a flashback. I'll make flashback chapter every 2 chapters.  
> Thanks for reading! :D


	7. Where the Dragon Lies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Looking for one of the judges, Sigrun went to Savelina, the land of dragons. She suspected that she might find the Abyssal Keeper there. In order to find the Abyssal Keeper, Sigrun had to bend in to the society and gather information about the judges. But when she arrived there, the situation wasn’t like what she expected…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *this chapter isn't a flashback. I'm gonna make a flashback chapter every 2 chapters, so enjoy! :D

The wind blew my hair softly. I brushed my long silver-purple hair through my fingers. I arrived at my first destination, Savelina, the empire of dragon.

Savelina, the empire of dragon, lies on the middle-east side of Flyria. It has tropical clime; which is why the temperature always warm there. Its temperature is the reason why dragons only inhabit this land. Dragons love warm temperature and lots of breeze, and the clime also friendly for them to hatch their eggs and raise their baby dragons.

Savelina itself lies on a vast continent. It stretches from the middle-east of Flyria to north of Flyria. But the northern side of the continent doesn't belong to Savelina. It belongs to Ixition, a kingdom where I used to live in. The temperature in Ixition is very different from the temperature in Savelina. It has cold temperature, which is why the dragons refuse to live there.

"The wind sure is nice." I said softly, enjoying the nice breeze and the exotic scenery before my eyes. It was really exciting to see something I never saw before.

"You better do your job before it gets dark, Sigrun. Or do you have no stomach for this task?" Nemesis said as she crossed her arms. I turned my body to her and shook my head.

"It's not like that. I was just... Enchanted. You can leave now. I'll find a way to get the judges." I said with confident.

"You got a good spirit for the beginning. It's a good thing. Remember that they're your responsibility." Nemesis said. I nodded at her. With the flat face as always, she teleported away, leaving the task to me alone.

I walked around, trying to figure what to do. It was no easy task to find the judges. And especially when I'm an esperanza. They wouldn't trust me, and my wings would make me more suspicious to them. I could conceal my eye color, but I couldn't conceal my wings, and there was no way to do it.

I thought about it very hard and it took pretty long time. I walked around unconsciously. And then I stepped on something hard. I thought it was a rock, so I didn't even look down to look at it. But after that I stepped on another hard object, but it was a bit longer than the other one, just like a branch, but strangely, it didn't break when i stepped on it. I looked down and saw what was the thing I stepped on.

It was an arm. Human's arm.

I jumped in surprise. My arms and legs were trembling. Even though I had seen several corpses before, I still didn't get used to it. Even my breath wasn't stable. After some moments of shock, I knew that I need to calm myself down. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes for awhile. After I felt much calmer, I reopened my eyes and looked around that place.

I was standing in a woods which was full of corpses. I must admit that I got a bit too excited and nervous to do this task and that made me unaware of my surrounding. Even the smell of corpses was really strong. The corpses were in a horrible condition.

"What... Happened here...?" I mumbled. I looked at my surroundings again, this time to look for clue. I checked the corpses. Their clothes looked like military's uniform. They must be Saveline's soldiers.

I slipped my hand into one of the soldier's pocket. I found a two-way radio.

Maybe I can find some info with this...

I turned the radio on; I pressed its button and started to speak.

"Anyone hear me?" I said. After waiting for some seconds, someone was talking from the other side. I thought it was a female soldier

"Yes! This is sector 08!" she answered. She sounded very terrified. I could understand something really bad was going on. But what was happening...?

"I'm reporting the situation in the forest! The troops have been defeated!" I said.

"You are not one of us!! Identify yourself!!!" she shouted at me. I was really surprised. I even dropped the radio accidently. I wasn't expecting her to found out about me that fast. Unfortunately the only thing I could do was to lie. She wouldn't believe me if I told her that I was just passing by, let alone claiming as the Crystal Maiden. I picked up the radio and pressed the button again.

"You're correct. I'm not one of you, but right now I'm your ally. My name is Sigrun, a mercenary. Your empress hired me in addition to your troops. Tell me your condition and location." I lied to her. I could hear her sigh from the other side. I believed that it was a relieved sigh and assuming that I tricked her successfully. At least I lied for the good thing.

"Thank goodness! The troops here are almost wiped up! Only 7 people survive, including me. Yet, we are all wounded pretty bad. We need help right now. Please come to sector 08 right away." She said.

"Where is sector 08?" I asked her quickly. It was probably the best decision to help her that time. I couldn't help but to worry about them.

"It's left of the-- GYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!" Before finishing her sentences, she screamed in agony. Hearing her scream sent a shocking pulse through my spine.

"He-hello? Are you still there?" I said with fear hinted in my shaking voice. My hands couldn't stop trembling from the scream. I could imagine something dreadful had happened. I waited for her response, but nothing.

Was she... Killed? Thinking about it made the situation even worse. I swallowed and spoke again.

"He-hello? Someone please a-answer me.." I said. My voice was very shaky and I couldn't help it. I wish someone was there to tell me that it was fine on the other side. But from the scream, it was safe to assume that it wasn't fine on the other side at all. I was about to turn the radio off when suddenly someone started to speak from the other side. But it wasn't the female soldier's voice. The voice sounded like an adult male's voice. His voice was very deep.

"We've got your friends here. Now tell your empress to surrender." He said threateningly. My heart was pounding even faster than before. Tell the empress to surrender..? Is this a war? I reopened my mouth to ask him a stupid question.

"Where.. Are they? Are they still alive?" I asked him rather softly, but he could still hear my voice. He snorted in response and gave me an obvious answer.

"They're dead. How can you expect them to be alive at time like this? Or, maybe you want their heads, lady?" He answered mockingly. I was right. There was no way he let them live. But still, their deaths had nothing to do with me, even if my feelings denied it. I was no one's ally. My only objective was to find the judges. But even so, I still couldn't stop the flames of compassion inside me.

Their deaths have nothing to do with you. I know you feel sorry for them, but the most important thing to do now is to get as much information as you can. Stay focus. Don't be emotional. I took a deep breath and cleared my mind. After I calmed down, I tried to think a way to get any information from that man. "I don't know what's going on here. I'm an outsider. The empress hired me."

"Oh I get it now. Believe me, lady. Don't side with the empire. The empire is obviously losing. Side with us or go back."

"What do you mean the empire is losing?" I asked him. The guy's heavy breath could be heard even from my side. I imagined that the guy was some kind of a barbaric guy.

"Why don't you just shut up and take a look around? Maybe then you'll find your answer." He said with the same mocking tone as before. I sighed, regretting the question I threw for him. I asked the wrong question. Noticing my sigh, he let out a bit chuckle, which made me felt embarrassed. Blood rushes through my veins to my cheeks. I just wanted to throw the radio away and leave. But sadly, that was an unwise option.

"So what's your answer?" he asked. I took some seconds to weigh the options I had.

"Fine, I'm going back." I said, giving him the answer he asked. It wouldn't be a good idea to join their force since my only objective is to find the judges. Joining their force would only tie me down. So I thought the best way to do it was to stay on the neutral side.

"Good choice. Now go home." He said, just like telling a little girl to stop playing at the park and go home because it was late. Without answering him, I turned off the radio and gave it back to the dead soldier who was lying in front of me. I closed my eyes and let a heavy breath escaped from my mouth.

This is just too horrible...

\---------------

It was quite a walk to finally reach the capital from the woods. My feet felt numb, but I didn't care. I was in Savelina's capital, Elden. Elden was named after the eldest dragon in Flyria. It is said that it resides deep in the cavern under Elden, to protect both human and dragon kinds. Well, actually only to those who live in Savelina. It's not protecting humans who live outside Savelina.

The capital was almost empty. I couldn't find any townspeople around. The only things I found are their houses and stuff. I investigated the location, but didn't find anything important. Finished with my little investigation, I tried to think where I should go. First, I need to at least find someone to tell me about the information I need. Since we're at war, my best bet is to head to the palace. It's not going to be easy though, and it is very risky. But I have to take the risks.

The palace was built on a higher ground, and its size was enormous. It could be seen even from my position, the entrance of Elden. Ignoring my sore feet, I started walking again, heading straight to the palace. I wish I could have just flown there, but it would attract too much unwanted attention, and I didn't even look like an angel. It would be bad if I couldn't gain their trust. All I could do about my wings was just to cover them under my golden cloak.

I was hoping to find someone, who is cooperative enough to share information, in the way. And just like a wish came true, I met someone after walking for about 4 miles; I found an old woman and a soldier. The old woman was down on her knees and the soldier helped her to stand up, but it seemed like the old woman refused his help. She pushed the soldier away. I didn't think it was a good idea to interfere with them since both of them didn't seem to be in a good mood. But what other choices did I have? I approached both of them from behind. I was just going to say "excuse me", but I finally noticed that the woman was crying. I stopped my intention and watched what happened between the two from behind.

"Please, ma'am. It's not safe here. We've just received words that more warriors from Skalvier clan are coming this way." Clan? I thought another country like Ixchition was the one who attacks Savelina. How can a single clan attack the whole empire, and more importantly, is the winning side? "Please follow me." The soldier pleaded the aged woman to let him evacuate her. But the woman shook her head and screamed instead.

"No! You don't understand! My son is still trapped in there!" she pointed her finger to a house. The house was already burnt down. "I already told you again and again! Why can't you understand?! Please save him!" she screamed in despair, full of tears. I couldn't watch it. It ached my heart to hear someone crying in despair. It reminded me of my past self, who was helpless and alone. I couldn't help myself but to want to cry as well. I wanted to help her in any way I could, but I knew it was none of my business. It would be best to stay out of it.

The soldier, who was unsure what to do, shook his head and looked at the woman sadly. Seeing the soldier's reaction, the woman stood up and ran into the house. But the soldier chased her and gripped her arm to stop her before she could enter the burnt down house. The woman struggled from the soldier's grip, but the soldier was just too strong for her. She was just screaming in result.

"Stop it! If you're not going to help my son, then I will do it myself! He needs me! Let me go!" she screamed. I looked at her desperate expression. Tears were dripping endlessly from those eyes.

No no no no! He's definitely still there! He's still alive! I don't have anything else in this world!

The thoughts strike me down right in place. I walked toward them, heading to the house. The woman and soldier noticed me as I passed through them. They stopped 'fighting' and looked at me with confusion in their eyes. I only gave both of them a slight smile kept moving forward. "I'll find him. You should go to a safe place." I said, more likely to the woman. The woman fell down to her knees again, crying quieter this time. The soldier tried to carry her with him, but the woman still refused.

"Please wait." The soldier said politely to me when I reached the front door. The soldier had yellowish skin and dark hair that reached his shoulder. His long bangs almost covered his right aquamarine eye completely. I couldn't deny that those eyes were very attractive. They made me stunned for a while. "It's not safe inside." He said. I could sense concern in his voice. I appreciated it, but yet, I still had to do it.

"I'm gonna be okay." I said to him with a reassuring smile and pushed forward. I pushed the door, but instead of opening, it fell on the ground. I jumped a bit by reflexes. It wasn't surprising that the door fell down like that. But I still didn't expect it to happen. The soldier chuckled softly to my reaction. I gave him a glare as my face became red.

"She refused to be with me. She needs sometime to be alone." the soldier said as he looked at the woman. The woman was still on her knees, crying silently. I took a deep breath and looked at the soldier, who was looking at me at the moment.

"Okay, let's make it quick." I said, corncerned of the woman's condition. The soldier gave me a slight nod in agreement.

"Can I know your name?" He asked politely. That was a question I hadn't heard in a long time. Maybe because of that, I wasn't sure how to answer such a simple question.

Should I tell him my real name? Is it safe to tell him that?

Trying to not think it for too long, I answered his question. "It's... Sigrun." I answered. Looking at him, I tried to read the emotion on his face. It didn't seem like he recognized my name.

"What a beautiful name. My name is Blaise Reonora." He said as he smiled politely. I smiled back at him. His polite gesture made me feel comfortable. No one had been polite to me since I'm an esperanza.

"Nice to meet you... Er, Mr. Reonora." I said awkwardly.

"Just Blaise is fine. Shall we go?" He asked me. I nodded in return. We entered the burnt house. It still felt hot inside. The smell of burning wood was still strong enough to make me feel dizzy.

Blaise took the lead. He led me to a room. From the burnt furniture that shaped like kitchen counters, I assumed that we were in the kitchen. Blaise stood there as he turned himself to me. "She said he was trapped here." he said. I looked around, looking for a clue, but I didn't find any.

"I'm sorry miss, but-"

"I'm not going to give up now. Please understand." I said, cutting his words. He looked down, and then he started to lift some burnt wood. I stared at him in confusion. He seemed to notice me.

"I'm helping you, didn't I say that?" he said warmly. Those warm words brought back my whole spirit. And then we looked for a clue everywhere in that room. I looked around and Blaise kept lifting the wood. Around 10 minutes later, we finally got the clue we were looking for.

Blaise lifted the last wood in the corner of the room, and under that wood, he found an object.  
"What is this?" He asked himself. Curiously, I brought myself closer to him. I looked at the object from behind.

"A sculpture?" I said as I kept studying the object. It was a wooden sculpture that shaped like a baby dragon. Blaise handed it to me. I took it into mu right hand.

Is this thing connected to that woman's son...? A momento perhaps?

"Oh yes, it is."

That unfamiliar voice startled me. I spun my body around, studying the situation. I was going to warn Blaise, but I noticed something strange was going on.

Blaise didn't move a bit.

Not just him, but the sorrounding didn't move either. The hot temperature had disappeared suddenly, scattering ash stopped scattering. It was like time had stopped for some reason.

What the hell is going on...?

And then a chuckle stopped me from drowning in my own thoughts. The same voice just like the one I heard before. It was deep and a bit raspy, holding a mysterious and dark tone in that voice of his. I looked around, trying to find the source of voice. But I couldn't find it.

"Looking for me?"

I spun myself again, and then I found him. He was standing behind me. He wore a long dark coat with hood, hiding his face. But even so, I could still see his glowing red eyes beneath his hood.

Glowing red eyes... Could it be...? Lodea?

"Yeah, you're right." He said, with a smirk on his face. I didn't know why, but his presence made me tremble. I didn't like the aura around him. It felt... Murderous.

"Y-you can read my mind...?" I asked. He didn't answered my question, instead he brought his face closer to my right ear and whispered.

"Scared?"

"Wha-what do you want?" I asked, trying to shake away my fear. I hated the fact that I was engulfed in fear around him, and he didn't even threaten my safety. I told myself that the situation was under my control over and over, but my body still refused to stop trembling. Noticing my reaction, he chuckled.

"How cute." He put his thumb and index finger on my chin. With those fingers, he pulled my face up to face him. My heart pounded faster than before. I felt the urge to turn my eyes away, but I couldn't. I couldn't take my eyes off from his glowing eyes.

"Listen carefully. I'm here to take something for you and in exchange, I'm going to give you an information you need." He said softly, but with threatening tone. I opened my mouth, trying to say something, but the words just didn't come out. Seeing that, his smirk went wider. "But first, I need you to sleep."

Suddenly after that, my eyelids felt heavy; way too heavy for me to hold them up.

"Sweet dreams, Crystal Maiden."


	8. Captured

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sigrun was founded by a boy. He claimed he was going to save her.  
> "Freedom", that was the first word that popped out from Sigrun's mind.  
> But her mind was already full with doubts of every experience she went through; she couldn't trust that boy.
> 
> But that boy, Alfred, showed her something she hadn't experienced yet for her entire life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a flashback. Enjoy!

"Are you... Okay?" the boy asked as he stood in front of the frame of the door. I didn't answer him. I was trembling in fear. I didn't know what was going on. There was a scream before the boy came in. And I knew that the scream belonged to the guy who took me here.

_What's happening...? And more importantly, how did that boy get through the guard...?_

Knowing that I wasn't going to answer him at all, he brought himself closer to the cage where I was in. "Don't worry, I'm not going to hurt you..." He said. Of course, I didn't trust him. Nobody had ever "not hurt" me. Everyone believed that I was a monster. And I needed to be eliminated.

"How did you get in here...?" I asked him. It was something I needed to know. Did he beat the guard...?

"My father and guards are taking care all of them." He said without stop moving. "I was told to save you."

_Save... me?_ _**Me?** _

"Why are you people... Saving me? What do you want?" I asked without hiding suspicion in my voice. The boy didn't answer me, he kept moving forward instead. And when he reached his destination, he took out a key from his pocket. He put the torch he had been holding aside, and unlocked the keypad with the key.

"You can come out now." he said with a smile on his face, as he opened the cage's door. I was hesitated to get out from the cage. What if it was a trap? I couldn't trust this person. "It's safe, don't worry." He reassured me. He gave me a hand. After I wasted a few seconds for thinking, I took his hand, and then he pulled me out of the cage. "Let's go!" he said cheerfully without letting go of my hand. He led me to the exit.

"Please wait!" I said to him. He stopped pulling me around and looked at me with curiousity in his eyes. Why wasn't he scared of me at all...? "Why are you doing this? Why are you helping me? Do you know who I am?"

"You are that monster girl, right?" He said lightly as those words stabbed through my chest. _Monster girl..._ I wanted to scream at him that I wasn't a monster. But I knew it was useless. No matter how many times I cried, no body would know the pain I felt. The pain would never stop, so why bother trying?

I looked at the floor, with an aching heart, I nodded. Accepting to be called as a monster. My heart screamed, refusing the name they addressed to me. But I couldn't do anything. I bit my tongue and held my tears back.

The boy smiled at me. Cheerfully, he cupped his hands around my face. He gazed into my eyes, without discarding that bright smile, he said, "But you don't look like one."

For some seconds, I didn't respond him. I couldn't believe what I just heard. I needed him to repeat that one more time. It felt surreal.

"Hu-huh...?" I said softly, almost whispering.

"I said, you dont look like a monster to me at all. You got a name?"

His words healed my wounds. Although it healed, it still hurt. It hurt because I had been longing for this moment. I had been waiting for someone to know me not as a monster. Maybe it was too early to be happy, but I couldn't help it. Tears fell through my eye pockets, making both of my cheeks wet.

The boy looked surprised. He panicked for a while. He swept my tears away with his finger. "I'm sorry... I didn't mean to offend you..." He said with a guilty tone. I shook my head slightly. I wish I could tell him how happy I was, but I was just too overwhelmed. I couldn't help myself.

"So... What's your name, miss?" he said carefully. It took a while for me to remember my name since no one had been using it.

"It's... Sigrun..." I said. Mentioning that name gave me a warm pleasant feeling in my chest. A little smile curved on my face. Seeing me smiling gave the boy his smile back. He smiled wider than before.

"Alright, Sigrun! Let's get outta here!" he said cheerfully as he pulled me along with him. I held his hand tight and followed his lead.

I knew he might have fooled me. Maybe it was a trick to capture me, a trap. My head had been warning me over and over. _Don't trust him. You can't trust him. You don't know what he's planning. How many people who have deceived you before? You can't trust anyone._

But my heart said something different. I wanted to trust this person. I wanted to put my trust in him. Even if in the end it hurt me.

In the end, I followed my heart, even when my eyes were clouded with doubts.

He led me outside the building. The building was surrounded by military soldiers. They seemed busy investigating the old building. Not far from the entrance, I saw 3 men who took me to this place. They were kneeling with their hands up. They were talking with a man who looked like an officer. They seemed really mad.

"You can't arrest us! We did this for everyone's sake! Doesn't the king want her, anyway?!" said one of the men, bursting with anger. He looked like he could stand up and take down the officer right away.

"It's the general's order." the officer said with a grumpy face. I knew he wanted to send me to the king as well, but he couldn't. He sighed and looked at my direction. He gave me a sharp look that could have pierced me right away. Or maybe that look wasn't meant to me, but to the boy. I didn't know for sure.

"That's Bailey, my father's subordinate." the boy said. He didn't sound as cheerful as before. I looked at him more carefully, studying his appearance. He was probably just a few centimeter taller than me. His shiny ebony hair was a bit spiky was inviting to be touched. But unfortunately those grey eyes showed a very serious look that made me think twice to try to touch his hair just for my curiosity. His warm pale hand was still holding my hand tight, as if he wasn't willing to let me get away.

"Is your father... the general he mentioned?" I asked. He responded me with only a nod. Processing the information I got, I swallowed. The king didn't capture me for sure, but the boy's father, a general, captured me.

_So, what's the difference? Either way, I'm dead._

I imagined what would happen to me. The general would probably kill me or maybe torture me first. My hands got cold. I fisted them to feel them. It worked a bit, but I was still nervous.  
Even when I had given up on life, I was still scared of pain, no matter how many times I had exprienced it. I felt really pathetic. If only I hadn't felt that way, I could've end this living torture sooner.

"Sigrun?" the boy asked as he looked at me. He noticed my nervousness. I swallowed again and shook my head. I knew what would happen to me. I told myself over and over that there was nothing to be scared of since everything was going to be over. It would be a pain to keep living on this living hell anyway.

"It's gonna be okay! My father is strict, but he is a kind man!" he said cheerfully to me. His attitude confused me. I couldn't tell whether he hated me or not. I would like to believe that he didn't feel like that towards me. But still, it was almost impossible. I hadn't met someone who didn't feel the same.

The boy took my hand and dragged me toward a man's direction. That man was looking at us the entire time. He had a very cold, strict look. He didn't look different at all from the boy, so I could tell that he was his father. When we got closer, that cold look melted. He smiled warmly at the boy.

"Dad, I've got her." the boy said with his cheerful tone. He pushed me forward. His father took a glance at me and looked back at his son.

"Good job, Alfred." he said as he patted the boy's head. Alfred's smile went even wider than before.

I didn't know how to feel when I saw that. I survived my life without parents. I didn't know who taught me about survival, but I knew how to survive, even in a very tough situation. I never knew anything like parents's love. All I knew was, live was to survive. Such emotional support wouldn't save you from hunger and pain. But lately, I tought that if I had any emotional support; if there was someone who at least didn't hate me, it would mean everything to me. When I looked at their bond, I felt concerned about my own situation. What would they do to me? But more than that, I felt envious. I started to yearn for affection. If only I had someone that could smile at me, pat my head, appreciate what I do, or welcome me with open arms...

"Sigrun...?"

The boy's voice took me back to reality. I felt tears dropped through my eye pockets. I wiped them with my hands, but when I did, more tears kept flowing. I couldn't stopped it.

The boy put his thumb on my cheek. He wiped my tears away as he looked into my eyes with an easing smile.

"You're gonna be safe from now on. We are your new family."

His smile was like sunshine that lights up a pitch black abyss. He broke down the entire wall I built to protect myself from other people. Although, he didn't took all of my doubts away, I wanted to trust him. I wanted to be able to trust him.

Because I wanted to have a place where I can call my home.

And I thought

_You might be the home I've been yearning for._


	9. "Monster"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Sigrun regained her consciousness back, a middle-aged woman found out that she was an esperanza. At first, Sigrun could deceived everyone. But the middle-aged woman refused to just let her go that easily. She left Sigrun with only two options; Let the woman go and her identity would be in danger, or kill the woman and shut her mouth forever.

Scene 9  
"Monster"

After the long sleep, I opened my eyes. I found myself lying on a hard mattress in a tent. I looked around and found that I wasn't the only one who was lying on the hard mattress. There were several people who also lying on it, injured. I didn't want to pay more attention to their injuries since they were severe.

I was trying to get up when suddenly someone came in. It was a middle aged woman. She was carrying a big bottle of water, but she dropped it. The water was spilled on the ground. Oh such a waste...

"M-monster!!"

Her scream rung over and over in my head.

_Monster..._

The woman was looking at me as she trembled. Her eyes was full with fear. She walked backwards slowly. And then she spun herself, trying to run away.

_Oh, shit! Is the spell timed out?_

"Stop moving." I said, using the same trick like the one I used when I attempted to run away from the laboratory. She stopped moving. Her legs refused to follow her brain's orders. But she still could talk.

"Wh-wha-what did you do to me, monster?!" She said, full of fear. I stood up and walked towards her. I stopped when I was right behind her.

"Please, calm down. I'm not here to hurt anyone.." I said, trying to calm her down. Though, she didn't calm down at all. She kept screaming.

"No! Stay away from me! Stay away! You've seen our country like this! Isn't that enough?!"

"Please, it wasn't my intention to see your country torn down like this! I'm just looking for a certain some--" my words were cut down when 6 soldiers came into the tent. My eyes went wider. They were armed with weapons.

_This is bad..._

"I-it's... An esperanza!!" One of the soldier said. He was trembling, but he pointed his gun at me anyway. And so did the other soldiers.

"He-help me! Please!" The woman said. She was almost sobbing. The soldiers nodded slightly and threatened me.

"Su-surrender yourself!" One of them said. They couldn't stop trembling.

Ignoring the pain I felt in my chest, I used the same trick again. They were paralyzed right away.

"Wha-what did she do?! Help! Anyone, help us!"

_Oh please! Don't bring anymore people here!_

I took my scythe out from its special pocket I made. If I pressed its button, the blade would flip out from its wand. But since I didn't push it, it looked like an iron wand. With my scythe, I hit their heads hard enough to make them unconscious. After making sure that they were unconscious, I pressed the button on my scythe. The blade flipped out from its wand. I used the blade to look at my own reflection. And I was right. My eyes were the same as how they used to be. They were purple. I sighed and casted the spell I learned from the guardian angel I met in Asgard. And my eyes were deep blue.

_I wish I wasn't born as an esperanza..._

"Hey, there was a scream around here, wasn't it?" someone said from outside the tent. I swallowed. I paid more attention to the voices outside.

"Yeah, I think I heard someone's saying  _esperanza._ "  _Oh crap!_

"He-hey! That's ridiculous! Don't be kidding like that!"

"But I'm sure I did..."

_This is bad. Really bad... What will happen to my mission if they find out?!_

I decided to stop wasting my time. I turned around to see the tent's situation. 7 witnesses were lying on the ground while 3 injured people lying on a hard mattress. Those 3 people were unconscious from the beginning, so they weren't threats. But these 7 people had seen me, and they saw my face. I had to figure out how to make them forget about what they had seen. Or at least deceive them. I consumed 3 seconds to think, and then Nemesis's words were recalled in my head.

_"... if someone gets in your way, eliminate them right away. They might become threats."_

_Kill... them... before they become more dangerous than now..._

I noticed that thinking about it made me trembled. I had killed before, and it gave me a very unpleasant feelings. I didn't want to kill anymore. I didn't want to take someone else's life again. Because, when I did that day, even they were elescias, I couldn't bear looking at their eyes. They were pleading to stay alive. To just stay alive. I knew how hard it was to keep my life safe. But in the end, I had to. Or I would lose my life's purpose. For an inferior being such as me, having a life's purpose rather than just staying alive was very meaningful. I just didn't want to live like before. Live only to breathe, eat, sleep, and see another day and night.

But that made me more hesitated.

_Should I kill them...?_

_No, I shouldn't be that hasty. Think. Is there a way to deceive them without killing them?_

Then I had an idea. I checked on the injured people. One of them had a long hair with a similar hair color as mine and she also wore a cloak. It wasn't the same, but I thought it might have worked. I switched our cloaks and cast  _warp_  spell on that person.

Warp is a teleportation spell. It teleports the target randomly, but to a safe place, such as town entrance, someone's house, etc.

I didn't know what would happen to that person. I knew it wasn't a good choice, but it was the  _best_  choice I could make in such a short time. And in a second, that person was teleported. Bye, stranger.

I wore her cloak to hide my wings. I looked ridiculous, I knew. But I couldn't care about it anymore. With the remaining nervousness I felt, I used it to make myself trembling, as if I was very scared. I screamed for help. Then some men came into the tent.

"Oh my god... What happened here, miss? Are you okay?" one of them said. I looked at the ground and nodded slightly. I hugged myself to assure them that I was scared.

"Could you tell us what happened?" a man said as he approached me. I nodded slightly.

"The-there was an esperanza..." I said with my eyes still nailed to the ground. Hearing it, some of them gasped.

"Oh god... How can this happen..."

"This was all her doing... And then... She left with a teleportation spell... I was pretending to be asleep when she was around... I-I... I was so scared..." I added. They seemed to bought my lies.

"Miss Sigrun!" said someone who suddenly barged in. It was Blaise Reonora.

"Salute, Lieutenant Reonora!" said all of the men, saluting to him. So Blaise was a lieutenant?

Blaise nodded. The soldiers put down their hands. Blaise walked toward me. He kneeled before me and looked at me with eyes that full with concern. I looked back at him, trying to make a relieved face.

"Are you okay? Is it hurt somewhere?" he asked softly. Looked like he also bought my lie. I felt kind of bad, but also relieved. I shook my head and smiled slightly.

"I'm fine... I was just scared. I'm glad you came." I said to him. He smiled back at me. He offered his hand to help me get up. I took his hand and got up.

"I was worried about you since you suddenly went unconscious. Do you feel better now?" he asked me. Hearing it made me startled. It reminded me of the reason why I lost consciousness.

_That's right... Lodea... He was the one who made me unconscious..._

I remembered how he stopped time and read my mind as if it was nothing. I remembered how he smirked slyly and how his aura around him was threatening, even when he wasn't threatening at all. And how his red eyes glowed, even beneath his hood. Remembering all of them made me swallow.

_He said, he was going to take something from me. And in exchange, I would get an information I needed. But what was that? I didn't get any information at all... And what did he take from me?_

"Miss Sigrun?" Blaise called me. He brought me back to reality. I looked at him in surprise and smiled as if nothing was wrong.

"Yes? Sorry I was thinking." I said assuring him that I was fine. He looked a bit concerned. I knew he was going to offer me more time to rest. So, before that happened, I opened a new conversation. "Umm, lieutenant? Were you the one who brought me here?". He nodded in response. He smiled at me in a sort of a weird way, like he was saying  _obviously, duh._

"Just Blaise is fine."

_Oh, I am mistaken._

"Oh, okay then. Thank you for helping me back there, Blaise." I said awkwardly. He nodded and smiled happier than last time.  _So he just wanted to be called by his name?_

"My pleasure. You helped me as well, anyway, Miss." he said politely.

"Just Sigrun is fine." I said back to him. It felt weird when you treated someone informally while they treated you the otherwise. Well, I knew that you might have felt special and had a higher class than them. But I wasn't used to it. My race is almost the lowest class in the chart. Well, not as low as aedolea at least.

"But you're a guest. I have to treat you well." he objected me. I shook my head in response.

"Um, I'm not used to be treated like that. Please treat me like a friend." I asked him. A friend. It was something I hadn't said for a long time. I had lost all of my friends. Well, maybe I wasn't their friends, since they had found out that I was an esperanza. But still, they were still my friends. To be finally be able to had a friend again in a long time, even when I had to lie, brought back so many feelings. The feelings were overflowing.

"Okay then... Sigrun." he said rather awkwardly. He looked at the ground as he blushed softly when he said it. I giggled softly. He was so cute.

"Umm, can we talk privately?" I asked him as I looked at the soldiers around us. They were watching us the entire time. It made everything felt more awkward than before. Blaise nodded and his face went a bit stern than before. He dismissed the soldiers. The soldiers left the tent, and we were finally alone. I needed to gather information from him.

"So, what are you going to ask me, Miss Sigrun?" he asked.

_Hey, what happened to our agreement?!_

* * *

We were afraid that we might disturb the injured people, so Blaise took me out of the tent. He showed me a very beautiful place, where both mountain and lake could be seen from above. I was enchanted by the view in front of me. The soft breeze stroked my cheeks, assuring me to feel relaxed. It made me speechless. Blaise grinned at me as he enjoyed the scenery as well.

"Pretty isn't it?" he said rather confidently. But I couldn't disagree with him. I was struck with awe.

"Yes, it is..." I said to him. That place wasn't as heavenly as Asgard for sure. But, it still looked beautiful. It was just naturally beautiful when Asgard was heavenly beautiful.

"I spent most of my free time here, alone. I feel more at home here." he said as his grin slowly fade. He looked emptily at the lake. "Probably because I used to spent my time here with my little sister when we were young." he said with a hint of sorrow in his voice.

"I see..." I said to him. I didn't know how to respond him. I wanted to comfort him somehow, since he looked down. But I just didn't know how and I didn't want to worsen the situation. So maybe by listening to him, it would help him to feel better.

"Well, she doesn't need me to babysit her anymore." he said as he sighed. A wry smile was curved on his face. I looked at him; he looked disappointed. I didn't know who made him felt that way. Was it his sister, or himself?

"Forgive me for saying such unimportant things." he said to me as he looked at me properly now. I shook my head and smiled, hinting him that it was okay. He nodded with a sad smile and looked serious again. "So what is it that you want to discuss with me?"

"First, can you tell me what happened last time?" I asked him.

"You mean, when you passed out?"

"Yes."

"When we were helping the woman from yesterday, suddenly you passed away. And I also noticed that the wooden sculpture we found was disappeared from your hand as well. Knowing that we wouldn't gain anything about that woman's son from the beginning, I decided to stop looking. So, I was taking you to the evacuation tent. But when we just got out of the house, that woman was kneeling. She was crying as he held something in her hands. She was holding that wooden sculpture that disappeared from your hand. I tried to find out how it happened. But in the end, I couldn't figure it out. Then, I took her and you to the evacuation tent." he explained. His explanation reminded me of Lodea. So, the thing that he took away from me was that wooden sculpture. And the one who gave it back to the woman was undoubtedly him as well, since he was the one who held it after me. But then, what was the information that I gained? And more importantly, why did he took that sculpture and returned it to the woman? I thought he needed it for something? What was his motive? I couldn't figure it out...

"Miss Sigrun?" Blaise called me with his usual formal tone.

"O-oh, sorry. I was just thinking how it could disappeared from my hand as well." I said to him. I shouldn't think too much about Lodea's motive. No matter what his motive was, we were in the same team. Team Asgard. Yeah.

"So you don't know how it disappeared as well?" he said, asking for confirmation. I nodded, and he seemed to digesting the information. "Then why did you pass out?" he asked. _Oh shit. I can't tell him! It's Team Asgard's secret stuff._   _It might go crazy if suddenly I tell him that an aedolea stopped time and knocked me out of consciousness. And more than that, that aedolea is also the one who is responsible for the disappearing and reappearing of the sculpture! No, it's just too crazy._

"It was so hot and the smell of burnt wood made me dizzy. I felt sick and... I'm sorry." I said to him. I tried to acted as apologetic as I could. I felt even worse for deceiving him once again. But, it was part of my job to keep information from other people. And even if I told him the truth, he might have thought that I was lying, and I would lose his company. It wasn't certain, but I couldn't ignore possibilities. I needed his company, and I couldn't just let him leave me. For the world... and my mission.

"I see... Do you still feel ill right now?" he asked. I shook my head. "Good then. What else do you need to know?"

"I've been wondering about something... Can you show me where the palace is?" I asked him. His friendly face had turned into a serious face, even he seemed as if he suspected me. I knew it would turn out to be like this. I was just a stranger. I appeared in the middle of catastrophe. I dressed strangely in order to hide my wings. Ever since our first encounter, he had witnessed many strange things happened around me. And now, I asked him to show me the way toward the palace. Even if he tried to cover his suspicion with his friendly-polite attitude, I knew what those aquamarine eyes were hinting.

_Who are you exactly? And what is it that you want?_

"I can tell you." he said as he looked into my eyes sharply. "But, can you please state what your business is?" he added, trying to conceal the doubt in his voice.

I could buy his trust. I could show him my Crystal Maiden's mark. If he saw it, he wouldn't be able to deny anything. I was the servant of god, who came to look for the other 11 judges. It would prove that I wasn't a threat. But could I just show my mark around every time I like? Was it wise?

... No, it wasn't. That would be the end of our partnership. Blaise was a very polite and respectful man. If he found out that I was the Crystal Maiden, one of the 11 judges from the legend, he would end up worshiping me. I meant, look. I was just a stranger, and he still kept that polite manner with him. Let alone finding out that I was one of the judges. He wouldn't be able to look at me, let alone hold a conversation with me.

_So, what should I do?_

"Actually, I'm looking for someone all over the world, and I think the palace can show me if the person I'm looking for is here or not." I answered him. It was a very bad lie. But if I took more time, he might have suspected me.

He didn't answer me for awhile. Perhaps he was thinking. After like 5 seconds, he answered. "Is that so? Can I know who this person is?"

"He's--"

"Lieutenant Reonora!" a soldier came running and cut my words. We both turned our head to the soldier. He saluted to Blaise, and then he started to talk. "Sirius is currently attacked by Skalvier!"

Blaise didn't say anything, but he looked startled. I could see him swallowing.

"I'm afraid I have to take my leave. Please get back to the evacuation tent. And please stay there until I come back. Thank you." he said rather colder than before and then left. I watched him leaving with the soldier from my place. I didn't move until they were completely gone from my sight.

I took a deep breath and looked at the beautiful view in front of me. Did I do the right thing? Should I showed him my mark in the first place? Or maybe I shouldn't have asked him where the palace was?

_Whatever mistake I made, I've lost his trust. So what should I do? Should I head to the palace myself? Or should I head somewhere else? There's no guarantee that I can find the judge at the palace anyway._

I took a lot of time to think what I should do next. But suddenly I was interrupted by sound of footsteps. I turned my head to the source of sound. And then I found that the same woman who found out that I was an esperanza. And my heart skipped a beat when I saw her holding a harpoon with her. My eyes were widened.

"I know who you are, you monster..." she said with a lot of hatred as she walked toward me. I stepped back as she came closer to me. My whole body was trembling. Fear engulfed me completely.

"P-please wait... I'm not trying to hurt anyone here..." I said to her, trying to make her understand. But she didn't believe me. She came closer and swung her harpoon at me. Thanks to Nemesis's intense training, I was able to dodge her attack.

"No! You're lying!" she screamed at me. I could see that she was also trembling like me. She just didn't understand my motive to came here. So, if she understood, maybe she would believe me. And I had something that could make her believe me.

I showed her my mark. I knew it was too fast to me to show it to her. But I thought that was the best option I had. The light of my mark illuminated our surroundings. The woman looked at my mark. Her eyes was filled with disbelief. After the light disappeared, she didn't move. I waited for her response, but she wasn't responding at all.

"I'm sorry ma'am... But, please believe me. I'm not a hostile. I'm a servant of God. I'm looking for the other 11 judges." I said to her to reassure her. But strangely, she was still not responding. I tried to touch her shoulder, but suddenly she swung her harpoon. Luckily, I could dodge it again, but since we were in a pretty close distance, I couldn't dodge her attack entirely, resulting her harpoon to ripped my cloak. My left wings were revealed.

"You? Crystal Maiden? There's no way our Gods chose you as one of the judges, you phony!!" she screamed at me hysterically as she swung her harpoon over and over to me. I stepped back again and again, dodging all of her attacks, until I could feel that I couldn't step back any longer. My right foot was on the edge of the cliff. If I stepped back once again, I would fall down to the lake. But the woman didn't look like she was going to stop anytime soon.

_What should I do?! I've showed her my mark. And no avail. What should I do?! Think, think, think!!_

In the midst of confusion, suddenly, Nemesis's words came back to me.

_"... if someone gets in your way, eliminate them right away. They might become threats."_

_No! I don't want to kill anyone! I can't stand it!_

She tried to struck me with her harpoon, but I held his harpoon with my hands. But, the woman got more power than I thought. She tried to make me release my grip and strike me again. My hands couldn't hold her any longer and I felt that the cliff I was standing on was starting to crumble.

_No... If I die here, then what about my mission?! What about the world?! What should I do?!_

( _Please choose your answer_ )

 _It's kill or be killed... I have no other choice... Please, forgive me!_  (Go to scene 11)

 _No no no no no! I can't do it! I just can't!!_  (Go to scene 12)

* * *

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Thanks for reading this so far! :D So, I'm applying the reader's option starting from this chapter. The story will branch according to your choice. This chapter should be the tenth chapter, but since the first chapter is the prologue of the story, so that makes this chapter as the ninth scene :D Well, I'm calling chapters in my story as scenes, so I'm sorry if I confuse you ^^;
> 
> The next scene is going to be another flashback. You will see that your choice affect the story after the flashback scene xD Scene 11 and 12 are gonna be published at the same time, so it may take time. But please bear with me! Because I promise that I won't abandon this story!
> 
> And lastly, I made an account for this story on tumblr. What is its function? It will tell you when the latest chapter was updated. And I'm gonna write more information about the story background on it such as, "What is Flyria?", "What is Asgard?", and so on. Not only that, I also post the character designs there. I've posted Sigrun's character design, but if you want to imagine Sigrun as your own character, then please do xD I don't mind at all. Your mind is all yours after all.
> 
> Well, the tumblr username is crystalmaidenproject
> 
> And you can also ask me anything there! Advises and critics are also appreciated! You don't know how encouraging it is to get more advises and critics to polish this rubbish story xD
> 
> Well, that's all from me. Thank you very much! ^^


	10. A Place to Call Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alfred brought Sigrun home with him. Sigrun was promised to have a new home, a place for her to return to. But when they got there, Sigrun was rejected.

Scene 10  
A Place to Call Home

In my thoughts, home was a place where I could return to rest, eat, and spend all of my time there. Of course, as a monster, I didn't have any place to call home. I dreamed of having a home, where no one could disturb me. Where I could stay there for my whole life without running anywhere else.

But, it seemed that my definition of "home" was shaken until I met him.

We were on our way to Reszveurric Mansion. A mansion where the pure blood of Reszveurric, the rulers of Ixition, lived in. And it was also where Alfred, the boy who saved me, lived in.

It was true that I didn't know his identity. But I didn't expect him to be the son of Ixition's mighty general as well.

Alfred's father; Doragann, was the one who was in charge of capturing the people who kidnapped me. Alfred claimed that he was only helping his father to find me. But it was his idea to bring me home with him.

I sat uncomfortably on the backseat couch of a transportation people called as a car. It had been very quiet ever since we got in to the car. Doragann was awfully quiet and Alfred fell asleep. I tried to sleep, but I couldn't. I felt too nervous to sleep. I couldn't imagine what would happen when we arrive at the mansion. What would the Reszveurric think of me.

_Will they accept me...?_

I clutched my skirt unconsciously due to the nervousness. I tried to calm myself down. Suddenly the car stopped moving. I took a glance out of the window and found an enormous building, guarded with a gigantic stone fence, standing in front of me.

The iron gate was opened by itself. Our car entered the entrance. Alfred woke up and rubbed his eyes. I looked at him, showing my nervousness. He looked at me back. A smile rose on his sleepy face.

"We finally arrived..." he said softly as he yawned. He looked very relaxed, unlike me. And it seemed that he failed to notice my nervousness.

The car stopped. The driver and Doragann left their seats. Doragann headed straight to the enormous mansion while the driver opened the car's door for Alfred and me. We got out from the car and followed Doragann.

My heart stopped as Doragann opened the mansion's door. The insides of the mansion was filled with extravagant interiors along with elegant wallpaper and royal red carpet. Beneath the door, a woman was standing there, waiting for our arrival.

The woman was about 5 feet. She had a long straight ebony hair. Her face resembled Alfred's, especially her sharp gray eyes. Deep red dress made her pale skin glowed brighter. A thin smile decorated her face as she greeted Doragann.

"Welcome home, honey." she said with a rather formal tone to Doragann. Doragann only answered with a nod. Then, he threw his glance at Alfred. The woman followed his glance and smiled more warmly to Alfred than to Doragann. Meanwhile, I hid behind Alfred, clutching my skirt as my heart pounded like crazy.

"Welcome home, Al. How was your trip?" she asked Alfred nicely. Alfred walked closer to her excitedly as if he had something special for her.

"It was awesome, mom!" he said loudly. He spun around and took my hand. Then, he pulled me forward, as if he was showing a flower to his mother. I nervously looked down. I wasn't ready for her reaction when she saw my eyes. "I bring a new friend! Can she stay with us? She doesn't have a house!" he said cheerfully.  _Er... okay._

Alfred's mother analyzed me with her sharp eyes. Her eyes looked like a knife that was tearing my skin away. It sent shivers through my spine.

"Who's your new friend, Al?" she asked Alfred. Alfred jumped a bit and answered his mother's question.

"She's Sigrun, mom! Everyone knows her!"

_SLAP!_

That sound filled the whole room. I stopped looking at my toes to see what happened. My mouth opened a bit in shock when I saw Alfred's mother slapped her own son.

Alfred touched his right cheeks, right where he was slapped. His eyes were widened in shock. He was stunned by her mother action. Meanwhile, her mother showed a blazing flames of anger in her eyes. Tears started to fill Alfred's eye sockets.

"Who taught you to touch her? Let alone bringing her here?" she said harshly to Alfred. Alfred didn't dare to look at her mother's eyes, he looked at me instead. Tears flowed through his eye sockets. Seeing that, I felt as if my heart was stabbed by a knife.

_It's all my fault..._

"Elena, stop." Doragann said, trying to stop Elena's anger. But it seemed like she hadn't done yet.

"How can I stop? Look at him! He's bringing that monster to our home!" she screamed at her husband. Hearing it, my heart felt like it was tore apart.

I trembled in fear and guilt. I opened my mouth, trying to say something that probably would help things to get better. But, the words didn't come out. I was left speechless.

The thoughts of me finally having a place to call home shattered into pieces. My mind said " _told ya_ " _._ I was disappointed of Alfred who had promised me to bring me  _home_.

No, that wasn't it.

It was normal for everyone to rejected me; I was a monster after all.

I was disappointed of my own expectation.

_I shouldn't have expected such thing. It was impossible anyway. A monster like me, having a home with humans? Being loved and cared by the others? Having a shelter to protect myself from storms? Having people waiting for me to return home and welcome me with open arms?_

_That's not going to happen._

_Never._

"You shouldn't have brought it here with you! Now what should we--" before she finished her words, I ran off. I couldn't take it anymore. I left the mansion  immidiately. I could hear them calling me from behind. But I didn't care. Why would I?

I ran through the garden, heading straight to the gate. The gate was still opened and it was left unguarded by the guards. They sure slacked off. I dashed through the gate and ran as fast as I could. I didn't know where to go. I had no destination. But there was just one thing on my mind.

_Get outta this place._ _**Right now.** _

I ran and ran, until I found myself standing in front of a cavern mouth. I looked back; checking for them. They probably chased after me. But, nothing. Nobody was there. I sighed. I felt relieved. But deep inside me, I felt disappointed as well.

_I wish... They would show up and change their mind..._

I shook the thought off. There was no way they would change their mind about it. Why would they?

_Why am I still hoping for them to change their mind? There's no way they're gonna do that. Stop expecting such thing. It only hurt you further in the end._

With a heavy heart, I decided to enter the cavern. I needed to hide from them. I blended in to the darkness and hid behind a big sized rock. Behind the rock, I sat down and curled myself into a ball. Tears started to streamed down through my cheeks.

_To them, I am a monster. I would be a burden. No... Not just a burden... To keep me around is just like keeping a bad luck. They wouldn't be happy. Oh, and what would other people do if they knew? They would do bad things to them as well. They would be in a lot of trouble if they kept me. It's tolerable for everyone to reject me. I'm just a monster anyaway. So..._

_This is for the best._

Tears streamed down from my eye pockets even a lot more than before. My heart felt like it was crushed into small pieces, like it was turned into dust.

_Why am I crying even harder? I know it hurts but... This way, everyone's happy. This way, I helped them to be away from a monster..._

_Me._

_I saved them. I should be happy as well! I should be smiling!_

I tried to smile, but it felt weird. Tears didn't stop streaming either.

_C'mon... This is the first time you help someone! And it was a big one! You became a hero! You saved them! You're a savior! You should be proud of yourself!_

But thinking about it hurt me even further.

_Even if I am a hero now... Nobody recognize me... I'm still a monster, no matter what I do._

I wanted to cry loudly. I really wanted to. But I held down my voice. In despair, I cried alone. I kept thinking about everything over and over. I knew it only hurt me even further, but I couldn't stop. At least, I thought I would be able to crush all of my hopes.

The hope of not having trouble surviving.

The hope of being able to smile.

The hope of having friends.

The hope of having a place to return to.

The hope of not being alone for the rest of my life.

The hope of having a normal boring life.

All of it.

I was tired of expectations. The more I expect, the more I got hurt. A monster like me didn't have any rights to expect things.

I didn't need any expectation. I needed to leave no room for hopes and dreams. I didn't want to feel that way again. I had enough.

Or so I thought.

No matter what I did...

No matter how hard I tried to crush every single expectation with every convincing arguments I had...

The hope just wouldn't die.

Deep inside my heart, I kept expecting things to change.

_I want to survive this life._

_I want to smile like any other people._

_I want to have some friends._

_I want to have a home._

_I want to have a family to return to._

_I just... Want to have a normal life as a human, just like any other people..._

_**But why... can't I have it?** _

The thoughts of it was killing me to my very core. I couldn't stop hurting. I continued to cry alone.

"...grun..." A voice was heard from my position. It was a familiar voice.

It belonged to Alfred.

"Sigrun, are you hiding here?" He shouted. I was hesitated. At some point, I wanted to show up. But probably that was a bad idea.

After wasting some seconds to think, I decided to not show up. I kept hiding behind the rock, until suddenly a light flashed through my eyes. It hurt my eyes, but I still tried to open my eyes to see what was happening.

It was Alfred, holding a thing that provided light.

_He caught me._

"There you are!" He said with a worried look. He put the thing he had been holding on the ground and came closer to me. He knelt down and saw my face. When he saw my terrible face, he looked concerned. "Are you okay...?" He asked.

I didn't answer. I didn't know what to answer. I only looked into his eyes deeply, while tears kept streaming down through my cheeks.

Seeing my reaction, Alfred looked away and scratched his hair awkwardly.

"I know you aren't... After something like that happened, no one would be fine, I guess... Sorry." He apologized. I didn't know why, but hearing it hurt me even more. I had been too sensitive to everything. I remained silent as I looked down, meekly hoping for the pain to stop, and the tears as well.

"Well... I've been talking to my mother about it. My father kinda helped out a bit too." He said to me. He caught my full attention. I stopped looking down and looked at him. He looked at me as well, with that smile on his face again. Seeing his smile resurfaced the expectations from before.

But still,

I felt nervous.

He took a deep breath before continuing his words. He looked into my eyes straight and deeply, just like a blade, without discarding the smile on his face.

"My mother agreed to us. You can stay with us." He said.

At first, I couldn't believe what I had heard. It felt too unreal to be true. But I couldn't deny that the joy inside me was overflowing.

Along with the doubts.

"Re... Really...?" I said too quietly, almost whispering. Fortunately, he still could hear me. He nodded firmly. Seeing such response made my heart filled with more and more joy and relief. But the doubts were growing as well. Until finally the doubts demanded me to find a certainty. "But... Why  would you keep me with you? I meant, I know that you said I didn't look like a monster to you. But what about the others? What about your mother? Why would you keep me around?" I asked him.

Alfred tilted his head in confusion. He looked at me with a strange look.

"Why are you asking?" He asked.

For awhile, I was unsure what to do. But after weighing my option, I decided to tell him everything. About my doubts, fears, and expectations as well. Probably it wasn't the wisest choice. But i risked it.

"I just... Don't want to feel hurt even further..." I said. I had stopped crying in the middle of my explanation. Digesting what was just learned, Alfred nodded and nodded. After being silent for awhile, Alfred began to open his mouth.

"I'm not someone who trusts people easily either." He said to me. He took off his mantle and showed a deep scar on his left arm. "I got it because of protecting my cousin. She was my best friend." His face turned bitter after saying that. He took a deep breath and continued. "Or so I thought. She was very close to me. One day, she called me. She asked me to come to an unfamiliar place. Without question it, I came to that place. When I arrived there, I saw some shady people held captive of her. She was tied down, crying. Seeing that, I got panicked. So I attacked one of the shady guy with a pocket knife I brought. But he was much stronger than me. He took me down easily. After that he tied me down too. But what I wasn't expecting was after they tied me down, they let her go. In the end, she betrayed me."

We remained silent. Looked like Alfred didn't want to talk about it anymore. He put on his mantle and stood up. He was about to say something until suddenly something happened.

The rocks inside the cave were all glowing. The pitch black cavern was filled with soft blue light which the rocks produced. Alfred and me were enchanted by their beauty.

"Wow... What are these?" I said, referring to the rocks.

"Well, I don't know either..." He said.

No conversation was going on after that. We were enjoying the magical view for awhile.

"Umm..." He said suddenly. I looked at him, giving him my full attention. "After they let her go, she ran away. She ran for her life after selling me out. I was kidnapped. They let me starve for days. I attempted to run away, and I failed. That's how I got this scar." He said.

"I see..." I said, finding myself speechless. I didn't know what to say, but I understood his feelings.

"But, you know... Even after that, I still forgave her. It's true that I kinda... lost my trust in her. But I still wanted to believe that she wasn't that bad. I wanted to trust her again. I wanted to give her another chance, even though I knew that I would be disappointed again in the end."

"So, I think..." He stopped for awhile and then he continued. "You cannot get rid of hope. It's the last thing that remains with you, even when everything else is lost."

I was stunned.

_So... Does that mean that..._

_It's okay for someone like me to have hopes?_

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading this junk!  
> ;w; is it bad? I knew it.  
> But advises and critics are welcome! :D


End file.
